I got a singing gig.... but... where's my contract?

Is it just me, or is life moving in slow motion right now? And no matter what anyone does to fix it, it stays the same speed. I think the batteries in the remote control have died. Or the "resume normal speed" button is broken.

In any case, in June, I had an audition at a reputable opera company in the Upper East Side. It had all the fixings of an audition that would bring about a favorable outcome for me. What were they, you ask?

1. It was a call-back/ make-up audition for those who were too sick the first go-round. That was me. I was still recovering from pneumonia.

2. On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being extremely self-confident, my level of self-confidence was at around 2.

3. While warming up at my house before leaving, I felt a tickle in my throat which quickly became a cough, which became a gag, which became the previous night's dinner in the kitchen sink.

4. My audition time was during morning time, i.e. before noon. That means, my voice was nowhere near 100% performance quality.

5. I sang a mediocre audition. The lyricism was good, but there was nothing really extraordinary about my singing... unless you count the warbling B-flat at the end of the aria.

So on my home, I was thinking about what a crappy day it had been. Little did I know, the events of my crappy audition day would yield a recipe for success.

A week later, I received an e-mail from this company wanting to know if I would still be interested in becoming a resident artist because this company wanted me to be one. I was so excited.

Fast forward three weeks. I get an e-mail saying asking for "us" to be patient as the panel was making its casting decisions. Once this is accomplished, contracts would be completed and mailed out... the next week. The next week came and went. No contract. At the end of the week, I get another e-mail stating that the contracts were written, but just needed the approval of the head man in charge. That was 2 weeks ago.

So my audition was about 7 weeks ago. I am STILL waiting on my friggin contract. And you know what, when performance time comes around, won't they be wondering why it's taking so long for everyone to learn and memorize their music. BECAUSE WE DON'T KNOW WHAT WE ARE SUPPOSED TO LEARN AND MEMORIZE!!!!

The slow-motion thing is a vicious cycle. People... please do your part to speed things along to a reasonable pace.